In the immortal words of Harry Redknapp, people want goalkeepers that don’t make mistakes – and they don’t exist. We need to start from this standpoint or the entire business of providing a critique could be misrepresented as a series of ill-informed snipes. After all, not everyone who scores against us is merely some guy who was gifted a goal by our man Hugo.

Against Arsenal yesterday, sadly we got another catastrophic error, another moment of unfathomable awkwardness that resulted in another goal being conceded.

In the following video, we see precisely what happened on each goal and my findings are thus; Hugo isn’t to blame for every goal, but he is to blame for too many, given the level at which he expected to play.

The second is; as with the debate over whether it’s Conte’s fault or Levy’s, there is plenty of blame to go around. Eric Dier and Ryan Sessegnon aren’t good enough to be in this squad, or what this squad ought to be.

If, in our mind’s eye, we sack Tony and retire Hugo, the next poor bastards through the door aren’t going to suddenly be just fine with fundamentally stupid footballers at their disposal.

This leads us to this business of coaching. I keep seeing unworldly people suggesting that Mourinho and Conte are no longer capable of nurturing talent. Dinosaurs, if you will.

Newsflash: Neither coach has ever advertised themselves as being in the ‘transformation’ business. Indeed, the idea that football coaches are somehow like elite security dog trainers, is essentially ridiculous. Some men simply cannot be reached.

I’d assure you that every player that came to Spurs and did well… was on an upward trajectory anyway. A coach can only seek to help a player hone his craft, but they cannot polish up a piece of poop.

Now Conte may be making errors tactically, and he might also be guilty of irrationally refusing to play Djed Spence, I don’t know about these issues with complete certainty.

What I do know, is that Sessegnon should be flipping burgers somewhere, and Eric Dier would probably make a good binman.

Any goalkeeper or coach with players as essentially dangerous as these two wrapped around them is a goalkeeper or coach that has been handicapped.

The case against Lloris is more nuanced than simply continued blunders. As captain, he’s clearly a political appointment. For me, Hojbjerg ought to wear the armband, but I digress.

Also, he’s begging to be churned, along with Dier. Both have been with us forever and have won nothing.

I hope this helps.

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46 Comments

  1. The 10 others on the pitch don't make it easy for him… having a goalkeeper as Captain always seemed odd, as he cannot really deal with what's on the shop floor. But Conte has run the squad into the ground like the buses on the 259… I hear there's real unrest with a lot hating his training methods and over defensive football

  2. Heres a controversial opinion. Hugo was great for a few years, not world class but definitely top 10 for a long time. He might have just looked world class from the defenders we had during our ucl final run. The lack of solid centerbacks may be making him look worse because he’s seeing more decent shots get through that would have been contested before? Im probably going to get a lot of flak for that but it doesnt make sense for him to drop off a cliff this hard

  3. just remember, Aaron Ramsdale has been relegated three times. I believe with lesser teams proving a goalkeeper is only as good as the defence in front of him.. he seems to be playing like a worldbeater at the moment and that just sums up tottenham completely defence is utter shite bar Romero who is always a red card waiting to happen for me sadly

  4. I’m sorry, but there are a lot more horrible attempts from him over the last 2,5 season. There’s that classic “Deer in the headlights” whenever a ball bounces around the edge of the box, the “Pass to Me!” moment when his feet turn into two slinky’s and the awe inspiring performance of the “Where the fuck’s the ball gone!?”

  5. I rarely agree with Garth Crooks on anything although I love the little lunatic.

    But what he said about Hugo being a world class shot stopper but not a world class keeper is absolutely spot on.

    He’s been bloody brilliant for us over the years but is sadly on the decline.

    Everybody forgets how he came back from that over extended elbow break. The lad is a warrior and has been a decent captain. But he’s now passed his best and I fear Son may be too.

  6. He was a great shot stopper but has too many mistakes in him. He's been on the vino too much. He needs to retire to the vineyard. We need someone who can lead from the back. His distribution is poor never organises the defence either. The only time he ever showed any passion was against sunny which was uncalled for.

  7. Yes get rid .. apart from his howlers how the he'll he has been captain all this time god knows . Only time he ever opened his gob is when he did that verbally assault on sonny … get rid ASAP..

  8. Lloris was our worst player yet again. Pundits seem blinded by the fact that for every spectacular save he pulls off (and yes, there are many), he negates it by far too many monstrous errors. This "World Cup winner" stuff people keep going on about wasn't because of him, it was in spite of him (with another horror in the 2018 Final gifting Croatia a goal). His limitations are well-known and haven't changed in all the time he's been at the club: poor distribution, doesn't come for crosses (and just flaps about when he does), spills the ball for unknown reasons, and can't command his box. And these frequent basic, school-boy errors cost us goals and points time after time. On top of that, we get the numerous brain farts like Sunday.

    Enough of ignoring his systemic faults: he's poor and too old to now rectify his career shortcomings. And as a general rule of football: YOU DON'T MAKE YOUR GOALIE THE CAPTAIN!

  9. Yes, every keeper makes mistakes but you hope they'll be few and far between. Sadly, that's no longer the case with Lloris. I will acknowledge that he isn't getting a lot of help from the shower of shite in front of him.

  10. The malaise has taken root at Spurs. The dark tendrils of this affliction have spread far and wide throughout the club. Thats what happens when you have Joe Lewis as main shareholder at Spurs with Tavistock Group. Lewis don't give a fuck about Spurs. Has no other sporting interests, but has a billion dollar art collection. The paining he owned of Portrait of an Artist (Pool with Two Figures) by David Hockney in Christie's salesroom sold for $90.3 million in 2018. Did we see any money out of that I wonder?

  11. If we played on the front foot more often we wouldn't have to worry about it too much but sadly we are under the cosh 80% of the time with a useless defence in front of him, of course he will make mistakes.

  12. Yep. Time for him to leave. It's all gone rotten with these poch players. Why are they still here. Also we have added more rotten players to the mix. The ones that are not rotten conte is trying to make them rotten. It's all rotten because this board is rotten. Anyway we can watch the rapper whizkid at the stadium. Bound to be more entertaining than the football. I have come up with a better idea. Lets start a new club. Call it tottenham blue socks. Get some American investment. Happy days. ENIC LEVY OUT!!!

  13. Just wanted to let you know I’ve read that a bunch of idiots on Twitter will be protesting at the Spurs training ground this Saturday. Even posted the time and address 🙄🤷🏼‍♂️

  14. Pickford or Raya IS NOT THE ANSWER
    If PL experience is vital, the only one worth going for is Sanchez. That man OWNS his box

  15. Appreciate the crap defending doesn’t help but seriously.. game after game we see howlers of his own making .. Sunday was the cherry on top of the icing on top of the cake .. we struggled against Woolwich from the off but gifting them a goal when he did just not good enough .. summed up our 90 minutes.. total inept..

  16. We should of been looking for a talented younger keeper about 3 years ago to build up and complete for Hugo’s spot. Yet again it’s another showing from the levy of complete incompetence when it comes to build this young squad he bangs on about. His attitude towards the whole team has been on of well the car is still running with 4 flat tyres and no oil let’s keep going until they fall off

  17. It’s disgusting how everyone is centring on Hugo Lloris. He has saved us so many times before. A goalkeeper is only as good as the defenders in front of him. It’s documented many times that this team can’t defend. It wasn’t Hugo’s fault we lost the NLD but you would think so if you just arrived from the moon. Arsenal were too good for us. Now we are looking for scapegoats. Hugo is coming to the end of his career, and we will need to find someone to replace him. But to hound him out, is total disrespect for 10 years of awesome service

  18. He wants to leave, he knows the exit sign is in view. It's taken his heart out of it. Has done us well but calling time now wouldn't be half bad. Especially when Arsenal fans were directly demanding their team press Lloris before kick off. It's an obvious weakness to exploit.

  19. And yes he hardly has a well coordinated defensive unit around him. This despite the fact we put all our team back to defend, creating a pressure cauldron.

  20. Nah no defending hugo for that blunder on sunday.. he costs us the game imho… he always does this in big games.. not my captian anymore

  21. He's getting past his sell by date. A good shot stopper still but not so good in other areas any more, lousy ball distribution. Bring in Pickford.

  22. Just like Dele Alli, I'm honestly just sick of his face. Always grumbling, looking depressed with the furrowed brow, as he contemplates another error he just made. I'd bench him for the third choice keeper at this point.

  23. A fantastic keeper with France and an average keeper at spurs. It hurts saying that but there is a big difference when he plays for his country and doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure that one out

  24. He’s been a great servant for the club for over 10 years in which he’s played an average of about 40 games a season. He’s been great for us yet the abuse he gets says so much about today’s football fan. I’m sure he will leave in the summer and go back to France. Had the World Cup been last summer I think he would be gone by now. The guy is absolute class and will be a club legend one day.

  25. Hugo is punch drunk from the shit defenders in front of him. Where was Lenglet on Sunday when Saka ripped Sessegnon one As for Sessegnon, no way should he have allowed Sska to breeze past him without getting a tackle in. Piss poor defending from them all.

  26. Hugo is getting a lot of hate ! What about Romero turning away from blocking Odgaard’s shot that was their 2nd goal . What is the point of standing big in front of Odegaard obscuring Hugo’s vision , then bottling the block by turning sideways ?
    I wonder if he did that in the World Cup ?
    Dave Mackay would have had him round the throat in his day .

  27. He’s been to costly , he has poor disruption and the back line backsides must twitch everytime they pass it back , ok he’s won the World Cup for france but that’s because they have a much better back 4 , but is Fraser Forster really the answer

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